The Purrfect Page

Humor

Bloom County

And who's to say that the nature of God doesn't involve some sour cream and bacon bits?

Dilbert

If you can't laugh at yourself... I just like the phrase "smarter gender."

Non-Sequitor

Brab and Angie exist!

Garfield

This appeals to me as reevaluate life and job.

Garfield

...and I've got first class postage! Can I scratch your tummy some more Angostura?
The following songs were composed by physics major
Ned Wingreen to torture freshmen in his charge.
I Wish I Was...
(sung to the Oscar Meyer tune)
I wish I was a hydrogenic atom,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cuz if I was a hydrogenic atom,
It'd be just my electron and me.

I wish I was a unitary matrix,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cuz if I was a unitary matrix,
I'd simply rotate iso-morphically.

I wish I was an analytic function,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cuz if I was an analytic function,
I'd integrate path-independently.

I wish I was a piece of positronium,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cus if I was a piece of positronium,
I'd orbit myself meta-stably.

 I wish I was an anti-bonding function,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cuz if I was an anti-bonding function,
I'd have ungerade symmetry.

I wish I was a high conductive surface,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cus if I was a high conductive surface,
I'd have uniform charge density.

I wish I was a magnetic monopole,
That is what I'd truely like to be.
'cuz if I was a magnetic monopole,
I'd reverse Maxwell equations symetricaly.
Del-Rho-Mu
(sung to the tune of Do-Re-Mi)

Del, an operator, a differential operator,
Rho, a mass distribution,
Mu, a prefix for one millonth,
Phi, a general solution,
So, another word for then,
Lie, what theorems never tell,
t, a symbol meaning when,
and that brings us back to Del.
Last updated by Me on July 10, 2000